Herbert Part ... Unknown

So again it seems it was mission time, the squirrels where getting geared up and slightly stoned as i recall, and herbert had perfected his flying geralph attack. It was time the stage set the mission clear, rescue ... well i say rescue i mean steal a priceless artifact from the manor of the pertinant Lord Farshar. <- took me ages to come up with that * anyway so they set off, by this point in the organizations history we had been going for a while and were now failry well off so we had custom built a rather strange hovercrafty type vehicle which to be fair was more crafty than hovery but never mind 2cm apparently still counts as hovering. Nehoo .... *editors note - writing this stuff is harder than u might first imagine, firstly you have to think ..... * editor has now been shot.
So the gang headed of, this was supposed to be a walkthrough nice easy job, prefeably with little to no violence, that annoyed the squirrels but hey they were part stoned so they agreed. When they arrived at the manor they found a slight snag waiting for them, the place had just been demolished to make way for a bypass. *see douglas adams* now this normally would be a problem with a bunch of drugged up squirells craving munchies and death and herbert being well uncharacteristically placid, but quickly i had an idea, i sent them all to look in the ruins of the manor to search for the artifact. however unknown to me was the small fact that it had all been a rather large trap to lure us there and no sooner had the first squirrel jumped the fence did all hell break loose (* not literally all hell as that would be a bit of an overkill but u get the picture, the author here paints us a seralistical view of a warzo. .... * Editor has been shot again.
Laser mounted turrets and large angry mongoose were unleashed on the squirells and herbert ... this was going to get nasty. I could describe to u in great detail the blood and carnage that the squirrels caused as everyone know as stoned squirrel should never be annoyed, however ill spare u the hour you would spend throwing up after u had read it and just tell u this, painting the town red got nothing on this. carnage. what I coudnt figure out was why herbert was just wandering thru this apparent warzone totally ignorant of his sorroundings and i suppose more importantly who had set us up? what was going on? and where the hell did the squirrels get there weed from? i mean seriously who sells to a squirrel?

find out this and more in next times edition of herbert